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Saturday 26 October 2013

Scottish Shower

When you wake up in the morning, you require so much motivation to get out of the bed. When I wake up and dread the morning, I hit the snooze button and hug my pillow for a little more sleep. But ten minutes is faster than light. Then I drag myself to take a shower and the hot water literally makes me forget the world. I keep telling myself that if I don't get out of the shower, I'm going to run late. But this scumbag brain does not listen. I stay in soaking myself in the hot shower and stay there forever. Now the thing is, hot water actually makes you lazy after a while and the skin gets affected as well. It becomes kind of hard and feels uncomfortable. One hour after the shower and I'm sleepy again. Hot showers weren't helping me actually. I read somewhere that hot showers tend to decrease sperm count and cold shower increases the testosterone production in men which leads to an increase in fertility. Not that I'm worried about this, but if you are are planning to make babies, switch off your heater. (The more you know!!!)

Here is a small tip for those who don't want to feel groggy in the morning. It is difficult to take a shower in ice cold water, no one wants to do that. But what I do is, as I am showering in hot water, I shut it off and turn on ice cold water. This sudden change of temperature makes your heart beat faster and increases respiration rate. I clench my teeth and feel like a Spartan standing under ice cold water. Yes! the Spartan's took freezing ice cold baths to enhance their mental strength and thus prepared their body for war. They felt that hot water was a luxury and for the weak. It actually feels refreshing and you can see for yourself that you are more active when you take a cold shower.

In James Bond novels, the character usually takes a hot shower, then switches to cold. The system of alternating hot and cold showers is called 'Scottish shower'. Mr.Bond learnt this from his ancestors I guess. Oh these Scotts! How surprised was I when I learnt how a kilt is actually worn. Reminds me of frozen meat balls (no pun intended...or maybe a little actually was).

So next time you shower and you want to step out fully recharged, don't fear the cold water tap, turn it on and feel the lightning electrify you. Refresh yourself!

Note: Please bin my advice if you live in the North Pole or South Pole.



Thursday 24 October 2013

Beach






Pebbles

Heard this from a friend. I shall narrate it in first person, as he told me. I know he wasn't making it up. I can assure you that.

This happened when I was in higher secondary, 11th Grade. A school located in a small town, that too on the outskirts. Since we students were hostelites, we used to spend our evenings in the school classrooms studying and there was always a warden present to look over us. Classes were divided by sections and I was in 'C' section. One day around 8pm we were packing and ready to leave for dinner located in a different block. Now the layout of the building is such that the classrooms and the dormitories were opposite to each other and in between there was a huge ground. Picture this. To the north is the dormitory, the south we have the classroom block, to the west is the administrative block and finally we have empty space on the east which leads to some bushes and eventually, the school compound wall. So the three blocks (three storey each) are in a C shape all enclosed within a compound wall.

As I said, that day, we were done with studies and about to leave for our dormitory. The other sections had already left in a line and we were waiting in a queue to disperse. The warden always does a headcount once we reach the dormitory to make sure no one is left behind. The ground in between is huge and it takes a nice 2 minute jog to get to the dorms from the classroom. Usually it is dark where the only light source is illuminated from the tube lights in the building corridors. We always switch off the classroom lights before leaving. Towards the east is pitch black.

Behind the classroom block are the taps for drinking water and it is close to the compound wall. So we were waiting in queue for the warden who had gone to drink water. As we were chitchatting and waiting in line, the warden comes walking from behind the block very furiously screaming at the top of his voice, "who was it?" He had his cane out and was threatening us. "How dare you? You think I don't know? Speak up." he shouted. I had no idea what was going on and was petrified and confused at the same time. From the line he picked out the mischievous lot and started spanking them hard. The students were screaming in pain, rubbing their ass after each spank. I was worried I would receive a beating. The students were begging and asking the warden to stop and said they didn't even know what happened. "Who threw the pebbles on me from top?". Apparently a few pebbles had hit his shoulder when he was drinking water. I was standing among the last in the line and was pretty sure no one had jumped the queue to do something naughty. The warden got fed up and said he'd complain to the principal and walked us to the dormitory.

After dinner in the mess, we headed back to sleep. By now the other boys from different classes came to know what happened and there was hot discussions. Then we went to sleep. The next day, the warden had quite forgotten about it I guess. At least that's what I thought. So after a class, a small break was given at around 11 in the morning. There was this boy who had gone to drink water and he came back to the ground where some teachers were standing and headed towards them. I didn't see this though, as I was in class copying notes. Many students were out on the corridor walking or just standing and talking. This usually happens during a fifteen minute break. This boy had gone to the teachers where our warden was present as well and had complained that someone threw a pebble on him twice. The warden got furious, dragged the boy by his hand and came near our block and screamed at the top of his voice. "Who the hell threw it this time? Answer me." he shouted. There was pin drop silence. I came out to see what it was about. The warden was standing facing our block with this boy by his side. The other teachers (Sirs) were standing watching us. "I dare you to throw a pebble again if you have the guts" he screamed. And as we were standing there quietly, a medium sized pebble came flying from the east side and fell right on his chest and then on the ground. Everyone at that moment looked towards the direction from where it came from. I saw the pebble flying and hit him with my own eyes in broad daylight. There was no one in that direction. Empty ground and further away were bushes. It was impossible to have come from there. But everyone stood in disbelief. As we were the ones facing the boy and the warden, we saw it come and hit him. The warden and other teachers took a few seconds to realise what happened and ran immediately to the bushes. The boy just stood there rubbing his chest. They found nothing.

That day was crazy as hell. This was the discussion among everyone. We were all spooked. There was a graveyard on the west direction right after the compound wall. Students started triggering ghost stories and other scary stuff saying it was something not human. I had no logical explanation as well. Especially after what I saw. I saw from my peripheral vision, where it came from. Yet no one was there. Definitely it's not the wind.

So that evening, after sunset, we all stuck together and no one dared to go out of the classroom or wander alone even to drink water. We queued up at 8pm and walked back to the dorm. We finished dinner and went to bed. That night, at around 2am, we heard a scream. There was a commotion and we heard several footsteps, the lights were switched on and the warden along with the security entered. The same boy who was hit by the pebble was the one who screamed. He claimed that someone threw a pebble on him again! A search was made and needless to say, they found a small stony pebble. I didn't know this boy. But he was no weirdo. Just a regular guy like me. He was panicking. The warden hushed it up and told the boy to come and sleep in the room where he stayed. The warden with three other teachers stayed on the third floor in their private rooms. The dorm was on the second and the mess on the first floor. The security, just a frail looking watchman in his 50's checked the room, closed the window panes and went off.

The security is one braveheart. He fears nothing. I'll tell you why. I say this because, he's the only god damned security for the whole school and he does night shift. Do you realise how brave that is? He is frail, old and carries just one torch and a whistle. Not even a stick. He patrols the whole school which is spread out in acres. He checks each block and classroom after we leave. Who would dare go out in the dark? Not me. Not with a bloody graveyard nearby.

So the boy is taken to the third floor where he would spend the night with three adults keeping watch. We all went back to sleep. I don't know how many minutes or hours passed by. We heard a shattering sound. What had happened was, the boy who was sound asleep in the room with three of our teachers snoring, was hit by this pebble/stone which had penetrated through the glass pane, fell right on this boy. When the lights were switched on, they had found that the broken glass pieces had fallen on the inside which meant that the stone came from outside and they even found the pebble.

I verified this the next day. I saw the broken pane. I saw how a few glass pieces were edged towards the inside of the room. How on earth did a stone come through the window of the third floor. No one human could have thrown it from the ground. And say someone managed to do that, how is it even possible that the stone would break the pane and land exactly on this boy?

This was the talk of the whole school. For one week, we were confused and found no answers. The boy was sent home next day. His parents had come to pick him up. No more pebble incident after that. We never heard of the boy again. Heard he got his transfer certificate and left for a different school.

A few weeks later, I heard from the other boys, something about the braveheart security guy. I don't know if it's true or not. At night during his rounds, it was his regular practice to visit blocks and check. Once late night, when he was in the classroom block's second floor, he happened to shine his torch down on the ground. And as he did, he got glimpses of several pebbles flying in the air, as if it were being thrown from each side, when he tried to find the source, he found nothing.